This is a game I call "Upset The Attachment Parent." Here’s how it
goes. You’re sitting in the park feeding your kids McDonald’s
cheeseburgers and fries and along comes a cute hippie mommy toting her
4 year old in a sling and signing to her baby in the stroller. She
looks nice, so you sidle over for a chat. As you’re talking she brings
up how tired she is (the bond all mothers share). As you’re about to
laugh and agree (you drank too much last night and got up early to shop
for shoes).. she offers an explanation: she suspects she’s tired
because she’s tandem nursing. Tandem nursing (breastfeeding more than
one child simultaneously) trumps hangovers any day, but c’mon. What 4
year old really NEEDS to breastfeed?
This is where the fun begins.
Here’s what you say back to her, "I think breastfeeding more than
one child is just another way for women to enslave themselves to the
patriarchy and constantly put the needs of everyone else ahead of their
own. Furthermore, whatever happened to MahJong and cocktails in the
afternoon? Whatever happened to being a good enough mother? Why the
The game will often end with someone walking away, but just THINK of the fun….